Hundreds of tech sites would give their third nipple to get the inside tip on the release date of Apple's 3G iPhone 2. The Hulkish scoop mongers at Gizmodo managed to conjure up a bulletproof story that only El Jobso himself could possibly debunk. While they have become ninja masters at debunking ginormous rumors, Gizmodo has also perfected the bulletproof post, citing that their source is, "someone very, very close to the 3G iPhone launch." Dammit! Who could possibly blow holes through that claim?
Even Fake Steve Jobs had to stop and take a long hard look at this industry changing news that caused many tech sites to weep and go flaccid with head in hands. No one is crying fowl... just crying like banshees while sopping up pant piss. Gizmodo has proclaimed June 9th WWDC as the holiest of all days when Apple will announce their 3G iPhone 2. Let us all take a moment to pause in a silent... DUH!
"iPhone 3G Launch Date Confirmed. Coming everywhere next month." Source: Gizmodo
There is a pure and unrefined maniacal genius that lurks at Gizmodo, making the likes of TechCrunch, Engadget, Cult of Mac, Mac Daily News and T.U.A.W. look like "Filthy Scum Hacks" to quote Fake Steve Jobs. You've been warned penis pumpers. If this short list of wonder-turds has not considered selling out all they own to the Gawker Media Network, now may be a good time. It will only get worse before if ever gets better. Ars Technica already took a dive for the short end money abandoning all too a bigger rival for a limp $25 million. It's the beginning of a new trend, a new friggin' era bitches. The masters of modern geekery will soon take over the planet. Resistance is futile!
Note: Yes... the iPhone Savior did come back from the grave to warn all hack-masters of their impending doom. Now I'm going back to being dead! So zip it hacks!